‘just another Sunday morning call’

dragged to the Turf Club Markets at 8 AM today albeit not kicking and screaming when I remembered how good and cheap the avocados are, and the coffee, and the delicious japanese vegetarian pancakes that my housemate Bobby Sunflower (not his real name) and I devour on a weekly basis whilst checking out the hot dads.

OK, Friday night was brilliant – TALENT IMPLIED 2011 launch (beautiful picture above by the gorgeous Sommer Tothill). One of my fellow Bali-goers Terranette (not her real name) came over around 3pm with a bottle of red which we happily consumed on the back patio before heading to Mermaid Tavern for another wine and then on to Gov’s for the event.

Of course i had to read first, forgetting that at some point I’d told Sally Breen – the wondrous woman that makes it all happen – that I would MC. Not wanting to look the fool I pretended to remember telling her and suggested that i would just read the editors note from the book (which i wrote anyway) and all was fine, thank the lord.

So when you put a bunch of writers in a room and the wine is only $3 a pop, its imaginable the state we can get into. Whilst chatting outside to my fellow blogger Ira McGuire i bent down to retrieve phone from handbag that was leaning against the wall – i put it there i swear – but of course said bag was actually a plant growing out the side of the venue. What a nob. Had a few of us in hysterics for some time.

Some shots of Gov’s – rad venue:

The night was fabulous anyhow, everyone read superbly. Jimmy from Jimmy and the Saints and the Sinners sang beautifully and i had to stop myself from crying when he sang ‘I dont wanna set the world on fire – I just want to start a flame in your heart’ Mummy used to lullaby me to sleep with that song when i was very little and I’ve never heard it sung before.

We partied on back at Sal’s place with a mixture of us students and Gov’s crew.

Then the ones left standing (Timmy was being propped up) came back to mine and Ads, Ash and I stayed up till dawn which is around the time I thought it would be a smashing idea to climb the tree in the back garden – not shortly after I remembered I was scared of heights and Ads kindly helped me down, what a gent.

So as it’s my last Sunday in Queensland for a while, Mummy and Stepdaddy are driving down from Brisbane, Moët’s in the fridge, we’re going for lunch and drinks at Alto’s. Their tapas is pretty sexy.

Flights are booked for Friday morning, Karratha here i come!

PS. I’m a published writer now! as well as a tree-climbing, plant/bag mistaking piss head.

Language is wine upon the lips.

Virginia Woolf


the launch is upon us …

Top of the mornin’ to ya. The only reason I’m awake before 8am is because my darling roommate Tony came in with coffee a short while ago and told me to get up ‘you lazy bitch’ – love him!

At last, the day of the launch of TALENT IMPLIED 2011 which will be featuring my first published story along with 15 other wonderful pieces from students – including my good friends and fellow Bali-goers, Sommer Tothill, Antonio Ruffino and Adam Narnst, not forgetting the fabulous Ira McGuire and Belinda Hilton who’s poem Four Letters, Three Words won the POETRY IN FILM FESTIVAL – PIFF2011 – meaning her poem was this years framework for all films, how fucking rad – Well done again Belinda!

OK back to me. Don’t have the BOOK THAT I’M IN yet but the wonderful person who makes this happen – Sally Breen – has sent us the book jacket cover which I will share with you now.

Pretty sexy isn’t she? The front cover photograph is also by a student who was a finalist for the Public Art Prize; original photography from students competition. The finalists are on show above the cafe at the Gold Coast Arts Centre for a whole year I’m pretty sure.

Anyhow – on to more pressing matters, what the fuck am I going to wear tonight? Whatever it is I will post on here before I go (have downloaded blog app – technology retardation is slowly disintegrating). Should probably print my story out and practise reading it. Feels strange because I wrote it over 2 years ago, but good news is, the piece I wrote whilst on Writing Retreat with Frank Moorhouse has been chosen for next year’s TALENT IMPLIED 2012. That piece is called The Simple Life and I read it at the Brisbane Writers Festival for ‘Writers on the Make’ where my mother and stepfather turned up and I had to avoid all eye contact with them when I got to the part about an American guy’s purple cock and a columbian porn star’s dark nipples. I asked them afterwards if they enjoyed my reading and my mother said ‘well it’s not our cup of tea darling but we are very proud of you.’ God love ’em.

Ok before I go, remember that crap article I posted from Carolyn Webb ‘Bali: Why bother?’ Well cool man Stuart wrote a response via travelfish.org, its great, read it! I especially like this part:

‘But you didn’t bother to make the effort to see or experience any of this, Carolyn. You visited Ubud across the Writers and Readers Festival, when, not surprisingly, there are a lot of visitors. You didn’t like it. But rather than get up and find some of the gems that have had people falling in love with Bali since the 1920s, you decided to opt for a lazy cheap shot raving about dildos, touts and serial killers.’

Remember remember TONIGHT:
Talent Implied Launch 2011
6.30pm Gov’s Espresso
2459 Gold Coast Highway, Gold Coast, Australia 4218

Come along and support me and my fellow emerging writers and lets get pissed!

A new day … a new tale.

So after a night at the beautiful Sally Breen’s guzzling ciggies, wine and late night anecdotes – I am still here after spending a couple of hours on the cold tiles of her bathroom in the early hours of the morning – those dreaded spins again!

Anyhow, we have mentally vomited all over this, frankly, horrific article by Carolyn Webb …


After volunteering at the Ubud Writers and Readers Festival which is mentioned in this article (I MC’ed for Alexander McCall Smith) and spending over 2 weeks in the glorious place that is Ubud, I can’t begin to articulate how culturally insensitive Carolyn Webb is in this article but of course I will – when I’m not sat at my friend’s table in last nights clothes devouring lifesaving coffee – so please read so we can uniformly devise a marvellous plan to shed some light on Carolyn Webb’s blatant ignorance of culture, tradition and appreciation of one of the best towns I’ve ever visited.

Before I go and wash my wine-reeking body here is the link to afore mentioned Sally Breen’s fucking fantastic memoir, published by Harper Collins, The Casuals.






Hello world! – i’ll stick with WordPress’ opening title, seems appropriate.

Well yes, hello world. After much procrastination and several whinging friends I have decided to start a blog. I confess, i am a bit of an internet/technology retard but i will persevere and hopefully provide someone somewhere something interesting to look at and read. 

Saw a photo/uploader thing earlier called ‘Gravatar’ and it reminded me of a couple of months ago when I walked into a Surfers Paradise Irish pub and met this cool mother fucker. Anyhow –

I have three things to say so far:

1 – I am moving to Karratha Western Australia next week for around 3 months to work on the sites there for more money a week than i earn in two months on the Gold Coast.

2 – I am shitting myself. I’m not the laziest person but today, for example, I’ve had a lovely day laid in bed devouring blueberries/avocado on toast and coffee and getting my social internetness on so 6 days a week, 10 hours a day is going to seriously fuck me up – no more staying up till dawn glugging back shiraz and watching videos of Fred Aistare and Marilyn Monroe on YouTube (oh yeah I did that on Tuesday night … alone. Weirdo.)

3 – I am reading on Friday night at the Talent Implied 2011 Book Launch @ Gov’s on the Gold Coast highway. Talent Implied is the anthology of student Creative Writing produced every year by students. This is the third year and I’m in it with a story called ‘Odio Shakespeare.’ I’m also featured in a blurb on the back cover and I wrote the editors note. Yay. Follow the link for more info.

Right that’s it, need to get out of bed, have another coffee, have another cigarette and start my day. Oops it’s 2.51pm and I have a date with a blue-eyed Irish man at 5.30pm!